So…lifestyle/diet-wise…I did okay yesterday. I managed 24 minutes on the treadmill at a nice leisurely pace and did 1 mile. I know. Slow. I did say leisurely!
The point is that I did it. That may not seem amazing to most people, but for me it’s huge. Now…tonight, my plan is 16 minutes on a bike, then hit the weight machines. I need to figure out how to use them, but I think I can manage. How difficult can they be? The question will be how much weight to use. But, I believe this plan falls under “cross training” right? Then Wednesday, I’ll repeat the treadmill, Thursday XT, Friday treadmill, saturday – maybe I’ll take a break, then Town Lake (3.5 miles) on Sunday.
Rinse and repeat.
Every day I just need to do a little bit at a time. One Day At A Time. And I’m not even an alcoholic. But if my ex can sober up and stay that way for over 3 years, then I should be able to manage working out, just a little bit at a time.
And then there’s the other parts of my life – the confusing parts of my life.
My son’s birthday is coming up and I set up a great party for him. Problem is…
not everyone can make it. Specifically 2 girls. He was going to be “okay” with losing one of them…but the second one? nope. So we are now trying to change the date – hopefully push it out one week.
And I can managed that, then my “friend” will tag along (assuming it’s his weekend with his daughter – girl #2 who is really #1 LOL). I would love spending the afternoon with him. But it’s funny – my son is totally confused by the daughter and I’m totally confused by the father. I believe they are cut from the same “mixed signals” cloth. What they say and how they act are two different things.
Both my son and I are empathic – so maybe if we were “normal” it wouldn’t affect us as much as it does. But we aren’t and it does and we spend our time in limbo. Not necessarily a bad limbo – but our hearts are twisted up in knots.
We both try to look at others, and try our hands at different relationships…but, we both end up falling back toward the father/daughter team. It’s who we are both comfortable with.
It’s annoying as hell. But…we both think that…if we hang in there long enough, things will evolve our way. If not, because we are both still keeping ourselves open to others, then maybe someone will swoop in and rescue us from ourselves.
I never expected to be going through the same “lovelorn” experiences as my son at the same time. Life has definitely changed. He’s grown up. And we commensurate our dating woes together.
How bizarre.
No wonder I need to become more active – maybe I won’t fixate on one person – or that hole currently in my life.
Maybe…if I focus on this 10K goal, life will just come around on it’s own.
Let’s hope.
